Advice and Encouragement to the Single Daughters of the One True King (Part 1)

Hello Hello Beautiful People! I hope you are all doing well and having a lovely week! For starters, I would like to thank each and every single one of you for taking time out of your day and reading my blog. It truly is very humbling and I am so grateful for each of y’all! With that being said, today I am going to write specifically to those who are currently single ladies. Now if you are not single, please don’t feel like you need to quit reading, for there may be some advice you can pass on to those around you who may be discouraged with their current relationship status’s state. Really and truly, I cannot wait to get started, for this is something I am currently going through now, and therefore, I hope my struggles and advice can help us all encourage one another whenever it gets tough. With that being said, let’s dive on in! ūüôāSo as we all know, Spring is in the air. The birds are chirping, the flowers are in bloom, the darn mosquitoes and snakes are out. What a joy those last two are right? It’s not like I live in Louisiana and both of those thrive there or anything. (Side Note:¬†I have a strong fear of snakes, so if you like them I have major respect for you, but I digress.) Even though Spring is by far one of the most beautiful seasons of the year, it is also notorious for the beginning of¬†Wedding Season to come about. Those young newlywed couples all seem to love it, yet it seems that most singles seem to dread it. And you know what, I get why. If you have read my post from a few weeks ago, Gut Wrenching and Honest Revelations and Some Encouragement for Those Who Need It, you know that I have been single for the past two and a half years. Though a lot of time has gone by whilst waiting for “the singleness curse” to end, I recently realized that I haven’t really utilized that time to fully prepare myself for when I get into a relationship. I recently have realized that though I want to be in a relationship, I don’t know how can I be the best fit for someone when I am not even trusting God to work in my life in ways I don’t think are possible, as well as, treating myself with the same amount of love,care, and encouragement that I love to give others.

I recently realized that I cannot have a good, healthy, strong and beautiful relationship with a significant other if I am not using the time I have now to prepare and actively give and receive love from those around me. This realization honestly hit me like a truck, and I want to begin by stating from what I have learned that if you really want to give and receive love, you need to be love.

If you want to give and receive love, you need to be love. 

This means that you need to go out and intentionally love on others, and focus on being the blessing God created you to be to those around you. Speaking from experiencing first-hand from those amazing women who chose to do so, you will be blown away by the impact it will have on other people’s lives.

Because I know there are others out there that are like me who may struggle with this stuff, I really want to encourage you guys to read this book that I am currently studying. It is called¬†Lady in Waiting Becoming God’s Best While Waiting for Mr. Right,¬†and it is sooo very powerful. This book according to the link above is only two bucks, and trust me they are two bucks well spent. This book offers great advice on how to fully be the Proverbs 31 woman God wants you to be and how to use the time you have whilst single to the fullest to fulfill God’s amazing purpose for your life. Trust me, it is gut wrenching in the most amazing ways possible. (Note: I say all of this not to promote the book in any way, but rather to provide a tool to those who may need it, for it genuinely is helping me in my struggles.)

In the chapter I just finished, it discussed becoming a lady of diligence whilst being a single lady. To be diligent according to Merriam-Webster is to be “characterized by steady, earnest, and¬†energetic¬†effort.” This is why it is common for hard-worker’s efforts to be described as diligent. And¬† this chapter discusses the need, as well as, the benefits of being a diligent daughter whilst waiting for the right man to come along. One of the many quotes from that chapter that really hit me right in the gut is as follows:

“Single women are not“Sleeping Beauties” waiting for their prince to fight his way through the thorns and past the wicked witch to finally kiss them awake. That is an illusion often used by the enemy to defraud women.” ~Jackie Kendall and Debby Jones

You see, we women are more than pretty faces.

We bring much more to the table, we are too bright and beautiful of lighthouses for God’s light to shine through to simply just lay around and wait for the man of our dreams to come waltzing in at just the right moment.

You see, God created us each individually with a purpose only we can fulfill with the talents and abilities He has given us, and though having a significant other is an amazing blessing to have, it is not the end-all be-all that the world screams that it is.¬†This book in this chapter really goes into detail about how you can go and actively be a loving soul to those around you, and shine his light whilst waiting and preparing for your significant other to come along. For example: your purpose and your ministry could be to intentionally encourage others. Or it could be to intentionally go out and be a prayer partner for others and pray with others and their needs, desires, etc. It could be to¬† intentionally minister through service to those around you, or intentionally minister through writing through letters, encouraging notes, creating a blog, *insert ironic chuckle here* or in any way you feel as if God wants you to go and do. It could be mere listening, or through hospitality,¬† or intentionally helping those around you.¬† Whatever it is, I encourage you to pursue it and the God who loves you wholeheartedly. And if you do so, not only will you help do your part for the ministry of God’s kingdom, but you will feel such an overwhelming sense of purpose and peace that is a beautiful feeling.

This world and the enemy is screaming that if you don’t have a significant other that you aren’t good enough. You aren’t beautiful enough. You aren’t ___________. And I am here to proudly stand by you and stand for you and say that is a lie. You are beautiful. You are strong. And you are enough. The God who created the heavens and the earth, who holds everything in his hands, kneels down and is begging you to turn to Him and realize who He sees, not who the world deems you to be.

Ladies, pursue Him. Cry out to Him. Chase after Him and be diligent in your purpose. When the time comes, if it is in His will and on His own accord (something I have been struggling with recently) He will provide for you a man that will complement you and be His best for your life.

Now I know we have talked a lot about women in this post, but the last thing I want to hit upon before we go is the men.¬† While you are waiting and being active in serving the Kingdom, I want to encourage you to begin to pray for that man. Pray over him and that he is on the right path, that his faith will be strengthened, that he will become what you need, that you will be what he needs,¬† that you two can help each other get through life and live it according to God’s purpose, and pray over whatever you feel that you need to pray over. That man is out there, and when you pray for him it will not only help him, but it will also help you. And that my friends, is amazing.

I know this post has been one of my longer ones, but I pray that it genuinely helped all who read it today. I encourage you all to go out and live with intention and diligence in serving the Kingdom whilst being single, and I want you all to know I am praying for each and every single one of you. Check back next week to see the second part of this post. I love you all and I hope you all have a fantastic week!

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